Rebirth Beneath Spring’s Canopy: A Soul’s Odyssey to Self-Revival

Spring is always a special time of year for me. As the season of rebirth, it’s the perfect time for self-revival. I have a very extreme seasonal affective disorder in winter and when the weather starts to warm, the sun starts to shine bright, and the birds begin to chirp, I go alive. It’s like a weighted blanket is suddenly lifted from my soul. I spent the past winter traveling throughout winter and despite it being a phenomenal experience in many ways.

I saw breathtaking sights I had dreamed about since childhood, met many wonderful people I hope to forever call friends, and learned a great deal about myself and who I am, I had one of the most difficult winters I’ve had in years. Now, I realize that it was mostly because I wasn’t taking care of myself.

This trip was a backpacking journey, something I hadn’t done since I was in my twenties. However, my first backpacking adventure was only for 10 days. This trip ended up being 3 months. I was going whenever Google Flights and FlixBus told me they would be inexpensive. Except for my arrival city of Munich and departure city of Porto, the entire trip was unplanned and my movements were spur of the moment.

This spontaneity was exciting but it also meant that I wasn’t able to anticipate and plan for my personal needs as I normally would when I travel. Backpacking also meant that I didn’t have any of the comforts or conveniences to aid in my self-care and maintain the healthy lifestyle that I would normally have with me.

Needless to say, by the end of month three I was really feeling the toll. I had wanted to travel for an additional month but I started to feel very depressed, nothing was interesting to me anymore, and I was becoming reclusive, spending days in my room. No one travels to another continent to lie in bed all day. I knew it was time to stop and come home, so I did.

Now, that I am home my goal is to heal, to undue the damage that I’ve done to my body and my mental health, and to invest in developing a lifestyle that will aid me to be my best self no matter where I am or what life throws my way. As a woman in her late 40s, I’m dealing with a body that is going through a lot of changes and the things that worked for me twenty, even ten, years ago simply do not anymore. My needs are different. I am different.

To start this journey, I’m starting with acquiring more information about myself. I realize that I haven’t had a physical since I moved from Washington, DC in 2022. That was nearly two years ago. I haven’t talked to a therapist either. I have gained over twenty pounds, and every attempt to lose the weight has simply resulted in my weight yo-yoing. I also have developed more joint issues, especially in my right hip. These aren’t simple aches either, I can barely put my shoes on some days. Losing mobility as a traveler isn’t an option, at least not without a fight.

I have also had a hard time focusing and staying motivated to do anything to push my life forward. Even writing this blog had become a chore. Eat, sleep, and drink wine is all I really want to do most days. It’s a problem. So here I am and I am asking myself what can I do. I know I’m not the only one, and I’m hoping that chronically this journey will help my readers too.

In my transparency, I’ll share daily insights, videos, and social media updates, inviting you to join the conversation. Let’s embark on this journey of rebirth together, exploring lessons learned, tools used, and the path to holistic well-being. Share your experiences, questions, and outcomes—it’s time to embrace change and prioritize our collective journey to wellness.